Normal operations were suspended at approximately 9:17 a.m. Monday after the office coffee machine displayed the words "SERVICE REQUIRED."

Witnesses described confusion, disbelief, and several employees repeatedly pressing the same button despite clear evidence that this strategy had failed.

Productivity reportedly declined by 68 percent within fifteen minutes.

By 10 a.m., employees had formed informal support groups near the kitchen while management attempted to restore essential caffeine infrastructure.

An emergency procurement team was dispatched to a nearby café carrying the company credit card and what witnesses described as "an extremely serious expression."

The machine was restored shortly before noon.

Employees are expected to recover fully.

Eventually.